I recently entered into matrimony with a Brazilian woman, an event that brought immense happiness into my life. The initial stages of our marriage were filled with joy. However, unforeseen circumstances took a distressing turn, and I find myself facing complex legal issues resulting from this union.
It appears that my spouse underwent a significant emotional downturn, marked by intense outbursts of emotions. Regrettably, I became the target of her psychologic volatility, subjecting me to distressing situations and challenges.
In the wake of these events, my life took an unexpected turn as restraining orders were issued against me, and my access to my children was significantly restricted. This unfortunate situation further intensified when my wife decided to relocate to Brazil, taking our children along with her. As a result, I now find myself in a desperate situation, with limited access to my children´s.
I am currently grappling with various legal complexities, including matters related to child custody, international jurisdiction, and the enforcement of legal decisions across borders. These intricate issues have left me seeking legal remedies to safeguard my rights as a parent and ensure my children’s well-being.
Who is she and why she is proceeding this way? Silvana Assad, a historian from the Federal University of Rio de Janeiro, explains:
“Born and raised in a remote village lost in the middle of the forest, brought up in a semi-agrarian country, tucked away in the remnants of a colonial period, with coffee and sugarcane plantations, amidst masters-slave estates and indigenous communities. From this environment, a famished population emerged, and from this very environment, she blossomed.
Many of them hardly bothered to ponder, compute, or strategize what would be most beneficial for themselves, let alone for their children. They lacked meaningful essence. When education is deficient, everything is deprived.
And there she is, living in a far land, very strange to her simplistic upbringing place. She dislikes the people here, she dislikes everything – the food, the music, the weather, the ambiance, nothing.”
And continues, “She cannot work and struggles to communicate effectively in the local language. She feels like they are laughing at her (and they actually are). And precisely this social isolation is what leads her to depression, madness, and escape.
And so, she decided that she wants to stay with her dear sick mommy, chat with friends just like her, walk around in flip-flops, and indulge herself in tropical dishes. That, indeed, is her truth.
She chose you because you crossed her path at a time when it made sense, it wasn’t an initially selfish interest necessarily. Somewhere in the past, there was purity, but soon it all boiled down to money, visa, and children, nothing else.”
To deal with your Brazilian wife, you have a few options, none of which are much more comfortable: you can fully submit to her desires, blindly submitting to all her commands (this is not exclusively for Brazilians…). You can choose to be passive, pretending to be interested in her opinions and agreeing with all her illogical observations. You can hide together in her cave, confined to the gutters of the house, avoiding any social interactions with others, which may favor reproduction. Or you can simply leave her before she abandons you.
When facing the first signs of her breakdown, I suggest not choosing any kind of medical intervention, like having her hospitalized in clinics, as this is considered taboo in her country. It will also put you at a significant disadvantage in any future custody dispute over children in Brazil.
Stay within the bounds of the law, and avoid domestic violence cases, whether true or false. As a last resort, it is better to involve the police before she does, always remembering that you have more knowledge of the local legal system than she does. Keep good friends close, and always have loyal and available witnesses by your side.
If you are in doubt, always have the children´s documents with you, especially the passports, as well any other important documents, and be very careful with travel authorizations. If she wants to go to Brazil, go together. During this trip, enter and leave Brazil on the same dates as her, be always together and vigilant.
If she is missing her family a lot, invite them to come and visit your place. If possible, even offer to pay for their travel expenses, especially for mothers, as Brazilian families are predominantly matriarchal.
Ah, and never forget the miraculous cure for all her crises – a shiny new car in the garage, a lavish trip to an exotic location, or a fancy piece of jewelry! Who knew that a little financial indulgence could fix everything effortlessly?
But if unfortunately, the relationship has already fallen apart, and she has taken the children to Brazil, you will have to take a different path to find a solution. But there is good news on this matter in the well-know Republic of Brasil.
International pressure has played a significant role in compelling Brazil to address the issue of the international abduction of children (Hague Convention) more seriously.
In 2022, a new normative instruction was issued, making it mandatory for Brazilian judges to return abducted children. As a result, there has been a very significant increase in the number of children successfully brought back home during the first half of 2023.
If you need assistance, I’ll be here to support you throughout this process to regain your children.
If you would like to discuss this matter further, please feel free to give me a call at +55 (11) 98433-5841 (WhatsApp) or send an email to mauricio@advogasse.com.br.